YoungLives offers support, friendship for teen moms

MOSES LAKE — It’s a Thursday night at the Moses Lake Alliance Church, and the teenagers are eating, doing crafts, talking and praying, just like any other faith-based youth group. But this one is a little different: they’re all girls, and more than half are mothers. 

“I feel like being pregnant and being young, you don't really ever have anyone to hang out with. You're just always home, kind of isolated,” said 18-year-old Amari Razo, who’s a little over seven months pregnant. “I feel like this group has helped with giving me something to do, getting me out of the house, giving me people to talk to, things to do, interactions.” 

That group is YoungLives, an extension of the familiar Christian youth program Young Life, which has been ministering to teenagers since 1941. YoungLives is specifically geared toward parents younger than 21 – moms and dads, married or not. There’s no membership, no dues, and although the organization is openly Christian, there’s no pressure on the moms to affirm any particular faith.  

“My grandpa raised me in the Lutheran church,” said Taryn Janke, who was there with her 3-month-old son Hudson. “My parents raised me actually, but he was the one that would take us to church, and we’d do devotions every night. I kind of lost my faith and then once he passed, I got it back, and YoungLives helped me with that.” 

One girl besides Razo was pregnant at the gathering Thursday, and the others had their babies with them. One-year-old Porter had the time of his life playing balloon catch with YoungLife staffers Lisa Naydenov and Kelly Wemp while his mom, 19-year-old Piper Bradshaw, socialized with her peers. 

Bradshaw had been involved with Young Life as a freshman in high school, she said. She’s found a renewal in YoungLives, both for herself and her son. 

“I wasn't raised in a Christian home, and so I was kind of teaching myself along the way, growing my faith,” she said. “I kind of stepped away from my faith, and that's when I got pregnant. But this pregnancy has brought me closer to faith than I've ever been, and so I couldn't be more thankful for that happening.” 

Unconditional support 

YoungLives uses the Alliance Church’s building for its meetings, Naydenov said, but the organization isn’t attached to any church or denomination. The church has a nursery available with volunteers to take care of the babies if the moms want it, plus a kitchen. 

“Every time we start with a meal,” Wemp said. “We always feed them, and then they take home the leftovers.” 

That’s followed by a game, a prayer, a short message and some activity or craft, Naydenov said. Thursday’s was a bouquet bar, where the young ladies could assemble paper flower bouquets in honor of the upcoming Mother’s Day. 

“They just love being a part of something where they can relate to the other girls, and relate to the mentors that have been there,” Naydenov said. 

This is only YoungLives’ third monthly meeting in Moses Lake, Wemp said. The first meeting only one mom came, she said, and the second had six, plus a dad. Thursday night’s meeting had six or eight moms, some pregnant, some with their babies, plus both teens and adults who were there to support them. 

One of those supporters was Delia Garcia. Garcia, 19, was involved in Young Life in high school and before that in its middle school ministry Wyldlife, she said, and now wants to support her peers. She doesn’t have a child, but she relates to them in other ways. 

“A lot of the teen moms were classmates of mine,” she said. “So just coming alongside them and supporting them … It's been really cool to see these girls thrive, having other people who are going through the same things.” 

No fathers were there Thursday, although Wemp and Naydenov said they’re always welcome.  

“We can bring the boyfriends, but (mine) works night shift, so I just let him sleep during the day instead of coming here where it's all noisy,” Razo said. 

Changing the cycle 

Twenty-three out of every 1,000 births in Grant County are to a mother between the ages of 15 and 19, according to statistics from the University of Wisconsin’s Population Health Institute. In Adams County it’s 32 out of every 1,000 births, compared to 12 statewide. Until recently, the nearest YoungLives program was in the Tri-Cities, and Adrianna Sanchez and her daughter Isabella Vasquez would drive there to volunteer until the Moses Lake group was formed. Sanchez had been involved in YoungLives in Texas when Vasquez was born, she said. 

“I came over here and I prayed about it and I went on Instagram and found Tri-Cities YoungLives,” she said. “I reached out and I asked them if I could help out and they told me, ‘Well, you’re pretty far away.’ And I was like “Yeah, but I’ll drive. If I’m sick, I’ll still go.” 

Vasquez isn’t a mother herself, but as a YoungLives baby herself, she feels strongly called to support her peers, she said. 

“I like doing this because getting pregnant at a very young age, you think you're a disappointment,” she said. “They feel unworthy … I like being here showing the girls, look at me and my mom, you know, like me and my mom came this far.” 

Vasquez is in cosmetology school and is about to graduate high school and go to college. She said she feels she’s proof that a child of a young mother can grow up and have a good life. 

“There's so many good achievements that happen between me and my mom, even though my mom had me at a super young age,” she said. “Life is going to go on and that's OK. Your life isn't over just because you had a baby.” 

Strength in faith 

That’s not to say there aren’t challenges. Janke’s family had trouble coming to terms with her situation, she said. 

“It was rough at first,” she said. “It was a shocker because I was planning on going to Eastern (Washington University) up in Cheney. We had a dorm situation, we had everything all set, and it kind of vetoed all those plans. But they all love (Hudson) now.” 

Bradshaw’s family was supportive, she said, but her pregnancy still came with its share of problems. 

“My biggest concern when I found out I was pregnant was because I wasn't married, and my boyfriend and I were only together for a year at that point,” she said. So my family was like, ‘Well, do you understand what this means?’ I think it was a blessing.” 

Bradshaw and her boyfriend are still together, she said. He also wasn’t raised in a faith-filled home, she said, but she’s trying to make sure Porter will be.  

“I got a children’s Bible for my son when he was born, and we’ve been reading that together,” she said. “It tells Bible stories in a way that’s easy to understand. I read that and then read the Bible to better understand it. The thing I wanted to do the most was bring Christianity into Porter's life, because that's how I wasn't raised, and at least give him the opportunity to understand it and choose whether that's the faith that he wants to choose. I think it’s super important to have as his backbone … so I try to teach him in the way that I know and we’re learning together.” 

Bradshaw was sporting a brand-new tattoo that said simply “Isaiah 41:10.” The verse it refers to reads, “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” 

“Becoming a new parent is so scary, and the thing that helped me the most was relying on God and knowing that everything was part of his plan and everything will be OK, and it's part of his story for me,” she said. 

“Hang in there,” Janke said. “It does get better. You hear a lot of negatives about being a teen mom, and nobody really talks about the positive. It's not as bad as it sounds. There are challenges, but also it’s rewarding.” 

To learn more about YoungLives and other local Yong Life programs, visit columbiabasin.younglife.org. 

    Amari Razo exchanges silly faces with her cousin’s son, 3-month-old Josiah, at a YoungLives gathering Thursday. Razo, 18, is due to have her own baby boy in nine weeks.
  

    Taryn Janke, 19, snuggles her sleeping 3-month-old son Hudson at YoungLives Thursday. An unexpected pregnancy derailed some of Janke’s plans, but she’s found support both in her family and in YoungLives.
  

    Piper Bradshaw and her son Porter take a break at the YoungLives meeting Thursday at Moses Lake Alliance Church. The tattoo Bradshaw wears refers to a Bible verse that says in part “Do not fear, for I am with you.”