COLUMN: Six tips to celebrate the holidays with someone living with dementia

AFA offers these six tips for creating a dementia-friendly holiday season:

• Keep decorations festive, but simple. Decorating is part of the holiday season fun. However, many flickering lights, noisy items, or major changes to the person’s environment can be overwhelming and could potentially cause the person to wander. Choose a few favorite items and phase in decorations over a period of days, so that changes to the person’s environment are less confusing.

• Eliminate dangerous decorations and safety hazards. Avoid fragile decorations that can shatter. Ones that look like food or candy should also be avoided, as they can be mistaken for edible treats and could create a choking or dental hazard. Be mindful of potential tripping hazards on the floor, such as wires for decorations, as dementia can cause changes in vision, depth perception and gait. Securely hook Christmas trees to the wall to avoid falls and use menorahs or kinaras with electric candles to reduce fire hazards.

• Adapt past traditions. Build on old traditions when appropriate, such as enjoying favorite music or movies, and adapt past traditions as well. If the person always sent out holiday cards or baked holiday cookies and still wants to do so, do it with them. Start new traditions that center on activities and events the person enjoys and can do, such as touring neighborhood holiday lights together. Whenever possible, ask your loved one which traditions are most important; these activities keep them engaged and help you prioritize and plan appropriately. Feeling some sadness about changes and losses, especially during a holiday, is normal. Acknowledge these feelings and then move on to new ways to celebrate.

• Take cues from your loved one. Utilize a strengths-based, person-centered approach and incorporate what the person can do and what they choose to do now, rather than dwelling on what they used to do. Focus on those things that bring joy and let go of activities that seem too stressful.

• Prepare a quiet, calm space before a holiday gathering. Create a space where your loved one can sit comfortably during a holiday gathering, and where guests can visit in small groups or one-to-one, if the celebration becomes overwhelming. Provide familiar comfort items in the space (i.e., favorite blanket, sweater, stuffed animal) to help your loved one feel safe and at ease. To the greatest extent possible, maintain the person’s normal routine when scheduling holiday gatherings; disruptions in routine can be difficult for someone living with dementia.

• Accept help from others. Many parts of the holiday season — shopping for gifts, making preparations or hosting a holiday gathering — can be stressful even without the additional responsibilities of caring for a loved one with dementia. Relatives and friends might be eager to help but do not know how. Accept their offers of assistance and be specific about what would be helpful; running errands, bringing a dish to the celebration, or spending time with your loved one so you can complete holiday tasks. The AFA Helpline is available seven days a week to help provide additional information about creating dementia-friendly holidays or any other caregiving questions. Connect with a licensed social worker by phone (866-232-8484), webchat (www.alzfdn.org) or text message (646-586-5283). The web chat and text message features can serve individuals in more than 90 languages.