‘Professional Zaniac’

MOSES LAKE — If ever there was a man who perhaps should consider switching to decaf, it’s Alex Zerbe.

“Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen,” Zerbe boomed over the speaker from backstage as he began his set Thursday afternoon at the Grant County Fair. “It is my pleasure to introduce a man so famous, he's giving his own introduction while standing backstage. This guy is a two-time Guinness World Record holder. He was voted the Pacific Northwest’s funniest prop comedian. He has appeared on ‘America's Got Talent’ and ‘Last Comic Standing.’ But most importantly, he is currently ranked Seattle's third-best air guitarist. He's blessed with the muscular physique of Taylor Swift.”

Zerbe immediately began flipping a Chinese yo-yo – the kind where a butterfly-shaped roller spins on a string held at either end by the juggler – while maintaining a nonstop torrent of syllables, seemingly all in one breath:

“Yo-yo goes shabam under the leg, boom under the other leg, sha-zowie under the leg and behind the back under the leg over the head under the leg behind the back with the spin move...”

Then it happened.

“Oh, oh, no,” he said as the yo-yo flew off the string. “Now you know how my dad feels: disappointed.”

Zerbe, who’s part prop comedian and part juggler, bills himself as the Professional Zaniac. Although this is his first year performing at the Grant County Fair as a solo act, Zerbe was here several times in the 2000s with his brother Matt Baker, as half of the duo Brothers with Different Mothers. He and Baker both went solo about 10 years ago, he said, because Zerbe preferred doing only family-friendly shows and Baker wanted to branch out into more adult comedy.

“I gotta savor the flavor of nutty behavior,” Zerbe rapped as he flung clubs about in a way that appeared to defy the laws of physics. “I'm gonna make your mouth water like a cherry Lifesaver. I've concocted a caper to fill my pockets with paper. Do Mr. Rogers a favor and won't you be my neighbor.”

Zerbe is a born-and-bred Seattleite (“I love it when Mariners fans are in my audience, because they will applaud even the smallest amount of success,” he said) and during the pandemic when performances were being canceled, he finished his bachelor’s at the University of Washington. Zerbe also celebrated his 20th anniversary this year, he said. He and his wife have two teenage daughters at home.

“That's why I like I don't do tons of fairs,” he said. “Because this is like five days away from home for me. And I miss my kids. I miss my wife.”

Instead, Zerbe performs at a lot of schools, he said, because at the most he might have to drive out somewhere and stay overnight before doing a morning show, then he can be back in time to pick up his kids from school.

“Although now they're starting to drive so there's less need for that,” he said.

Zerbe brought a couple of younger audience members onstage to help with his act Thursday. Eight-year-old Gracie Rees of Moses Lake put on a helmet and held up two spinning balls representing Earth and Mars, while Zerbe balanced a larger yellow ball on her head, turning her into a one-girl solar system. A few minutes later her sister Stella, 5, fired an apple out of a slingshot for Zerbe to catch on a fork held in his teeth while standing on a balance board and juggling a nine-pound bowling ball, a raw egg and a machete.

“It’s great,” said Kate Buchanan, who was watching with Gracie and Stella and filming them on her phone. “This is super fun.”

Joel Martin may be reached via email at jmartin@columbiabasinherald.com.

In the print edition of this article, the name of Zerbe's former comedy partner was given incorrectly, as was the name under which the duo performed. It has been corrected above.