Give up your guns, we'll run the world

It seems you can't turn on TV news nowadays without catching some discussion about guns. I'm not going to discuss the issue except to give you the final words - my family.

They are a bunch of nice guys, but they lean toward dominance and, some might say, violence. If some day you're not under the thumb of the government, you could be kissing the ring of one of these.

You've got to be wondering how this happened, with placid little me as the leader of such a group. Well, this all started when I met my wife Pat.

I was a lover. She was a fighter.

Pat had survived a fork attack in the forehead from a sister when she was six. She'd once done dishes at knifepoint.

I recognized the value of this lady right away. I knew if I married her, I'd have a lifetime security detail.

Now I have a number of family members who can take over as she starts to near the age of retirement.

First there are my grandsons Juan and Mateo Escobar. They are part of the Mead Big Cat wrestling club in Spokane, which teaches folk style wrestling.

Their coaches are their dad Grover and big brother Manuel. Grover finished fifth in state A in his day. Manuel made it to the 3A regionals this year.

Juan (age 9-10, 83-85 pounds division) and Mateo (7-8, 60-62) are catching on fast. In tournaments at Wilbur and Spokane the last two weeks, both won championships. They have posted 12 pins in 12 matches over that stretch.

Juan and Mateo have only one intent when the whistle blows: attack, attack, attack. They understand that dominance rules.

And if they're not good enough to replace Pat, I have my daughter Jenny and son Teddy. They're into violence.

Both love hockey.

It's not good when the Tri-City Americans (Jenny) play the Spokane Chiefs (Teddy).

Friday Teddy, his wife Sabrina (eight months pregnant) and their 2-year-old son Ray went to the TC-Spokane game in Spokane. Spokane won, but there were more important things.

"We got seats right behind the net," Teddy said. "There was a big pile-up right in front of us. There were bodies and punches going everywhere. It was awesome."

Saturday Teddy and family went to the TC-Spokane game from our house in Granger. Instead of asking us to babysit, Teddy and Sabrina put Ray down for a late nap, then woke him and went.

He looked really cute in his Spokane Chiefs Jersey going out the door thrusting his fist and cheering, "Go Chiefs Go."

And Jenny after her first Americans game? It didn't really matter which team had won.

"There were at least six good fights," she.

So go ahead and give up your guns. We're preparing a world without them.