Mass murder a good time to seek God?

I was driving to my doctor's office late Friday and caught talk show host Jerry Doyle ranting about the power of God, in regards to the school massacre in Newtown, Connecticut.

The shootings took Doyle back to when he was 12 and yelled a vile expletive at God because of the untimely death of his father. Friday, at 50-something, he was repeating his thoughts of back then.

During his rant against God, Doyle said he had been an altar boy and had graduated from Catholic grammar, middle and high school and was generally a man who believed.

Well then, I wondered, how had he missed the answers to his questions. Either he wasn't listening or didn't want to hear.

Basically, in relation to his father's death or Newtown, Doyle asked: Where was God? What kind of a God does this?

He asked for people to call in and discuss these questions. Thankfully, most callers tried to convince Doyle he was off the mark.

Had I called, I would have told Doyle I once had to deal with an untimely death. My daughter Brenda died in a car crash when she was just 15.

For the first time, I experienced a truly broken heart. It is not the same feeling as when a girlfriend walks away. This is a break you can feel physically. It's like a big hole in your chest.

It took a long time, but it eventually closed. I see Brenda every day now, walking, running, talking, laughing. I pray for her every night, sometimes during the day.

That night that Brenda died, I wondered if I should be angry with God. And I couldn't think of a reason why.

Acting with the free will God gave me, I allowed Brenda to go to her friend's house instead of taking her with us to the district wrestling meet to cheer for her brother.

Acting with the free will God gave her, the friend's mother gave her unlicensed, inexperienced daughter the car to go to McDonald's with Brenda in the car.

Acting with the free will God gave her, the friend gathered up several other kids and headed to a home out in the countryside through an unlit road with a sudden jog.

To Doyle's first question, God was at Newtown, probably weeping on the curb across the street. Acting with the free will God gave him, that 20-year-old shooter carried out his massacre.

Neither the children nor the parents had fault. They just happened to be in the path of a seemingly Godless individual.

You see, Jerry, God is always there. He gives us life and free will and parents to, hopefully, help us get to the age of reason. He also gives us a manual (Bible) where we can find the keys to successful living as we begin to reason.

Then God sits back and hopes we listen to His word. To force His word upon us would be to take free will away.

As to the second question, Jerry, God didn't do this. He never does these things. But he gives us the free will to do right or wrong. This individual chose wrong.

Now you, Jerry, have to choose right or wrong. Dig deep into all that Catholic schooling you had. This time listen to His word. You may be the best talk show host among six billion humans, but you'll never top God with your own word.