Grant County Farm Bureau attracts crowd

Group listens to speakers, names officers

MOSES LAKE - About 135 people gathered at the Grant County Farm Bureau's banquet Thursday to socialize, elect officers and listen to a comedy act.

But before the act, Washington State Farm Bureau President Steve Appel addressed the audience of farm bureau members and state and local officials.

Appel told the crowd this is the political season and reminded them to vote because the agricultural vote is a swing vote.

He mentioned a state Senate race that was only won by about 2,000 votes and the contested 2004 governor's race between Gov. Christine Gregoire and Dino Rossi.

Appel advised the group to knock on doors and talk to neighbors and family about the election.

"This will make a huge difference in the direction we go as a state," he noted.

The guest speaker of the evening was Florida lawyer Luther Beauchamp, who performed a comedy routine.

Below are excerpts of his act for the audience, in which he added audience members' names in the fictitious short stories.

Beauchamp poked fun at his short stature, his profession and at people in the audience. In many instances, the audience responded with laughter.

First, he started with self-deprecating humor and mentioned how his client read an article in the New England Journal of Medicine where white rats were not being used in medical experiments.

Lawyers were being used in the experiments instead, Beauchamp said. There's just some things you can't get rats to do and the lab assistants were getting attached to the rats, he said.

Beauchamp also mentioned how Quincy farmer Larry Williamson got stuck on an escalator for a few hours during a power outage.

The act also satirized stories in the Columbia Basin Herald. He mentioned a story in the paper about a police investigation continuing into the vandalism case regarding bathroom fixtures, although the police had nothing to go on.

Another story talked about iced tea causing blindness if the drinker doesn't remove the spoon, he said.

Beauchamp also made fun of a local man's devotion to a local sports team. Richard Callahan of Royal City was so upset about the Royal City Nights' loss to Connell a few years ago, he reportedly tried to blow up a Connell school bus. Callahan burned his mouth on the bus exhaust pipe.

Beauchamp ended his jokes about audience members by saying he didn't have time to embarrass and humiliate everyone.

He also talked about education and how people can continue learning by reading bumper stickers.

"Start each day with a smile," is one example.

"Happiness is seeing your mother-in-law on a milk carton," is another bumper sticker slogan. (A man from Biloxi, Miss., told Beauchamp the sticker interfered with his milk drinking.)

Beauchamp also talked about the "Run Obama Run" sticker referencing Presidential candidate Barack Obama. Democrats put the sticker on the back bumper of their cars and Republicans place the sticker on the front bumper, Beauchamp said.

In closing, Beauchamp said the main thing in his life is his relationship with Christ. He told the audience to take relationships with their families, friends and co-workers seriously, not themselves.

Golladay recognized Chris Hesse and Tom Dent for their work on the board. Hesse and Dent stepped down this year.

Golladay also thanked his wife Shanna for her support with a bouquet of pink roses.

Gary Russell was recognized for donating a hunting package to a live auction for scholarships.

The positions of president, vice president, area directors and directors-at-large were elected.

Golladay will continue to serve as president and Greg Rathbun as vice president.

Area directors are: Terry Byington, Rathbun (Moses Lake), Mike LaPlant (Ephrata) Sam Krautschied, Larry Williamson (Quincy), Kennon Forester, Rich Callahan (Royal City), Smokey Kisler, Andi Vincent (Warden), Peter Dufault (Mattawa) and Darren Hinen (north Grant County).

There are three area director openings in Ephrata, Mattawa and for the north Grant County position.

Directors at-large are: John Bates, Golladay, Pat McPartland, Jared Omlin and Kathy Hanford-Wiley. There are two at-large director openings.

The next board meeting is Dec. 18, with time and location to be determined.