Can I get a human on the line … please

I honestly love technology.

Computers, digital cameras, touch cellphones and all of the other fun tech gadgets out there. In many ways technology has made our everyday lives easier and more entertaining.

A friend e-mailed 3D pictures of her ultrasound, and I was able to see a tiny person. My truck's computer tells me how many miles until its tank is empty. My mother recently joked that a GPS navigation system saved her marriage.

Even with so much to be thankful for, I've come to realize that technology comes with its downfalls.

Last week I came face-to-face with a couple unexpected glitches.

I received a renewed debit card from my bank, in my maiden name. The same bank that changed my account, and issued me a new debit card with my married name. Concerned, I figured a simple phone call would clear it all up.

Glitch number one: Automated voice girl.

"Thanks for calling … Please press one to check your current account," an automated female voice sweetly flowed through my cellphone earpiece.

Glitch number two: Modern cellphones.

Most modern cellphones, ones purchased in the last two years, have developed a keypad that is used for texting. These keypads have extra keys and letters laid out similar to a computer keyboard. This only becomes a problem if your passwords were memorized as letters, for example LACE, versus numbers.

I proceeded to enter all my information and after the millionth time of getting, "your account number or password doesn't match our records," from the voice, my patience started to disappear. I realized I needed to talk to a human being.

Funny thing, I couldn't figure out how to do that. Even when trying to report a lost or stolen card. So, I decided to call our local branch and see if I could get their help.

Upon dialing the local number, "Thanks for calling … If you would like to know our hours of operation … ," the familiar automated female voice oozed, as I rolled my eyes.

I breathed a sigh of relief as I heard, "If you want to speak to a representative please stay on the line." At which point my call was immediately disconnected.

I tried again, and this time a real male voice answered. I apologized for having issues, and explained my situation to a very quiet phone line.

"Um, I don't know how to help you," he said. "Actually you're lucky I even picked up the phone. Uhh, everyone's busy right now, so no one can take your call."

My mind went blank. As I hung up, all I could do was chuckle.

Sometimes when you get what you want, it doesn't help. Technology can only do so much.

Jonda Spurbeck is the design chief for the Columbia Basin Herald. She still has an affection for her cellphone and camera, and exemplary skills at using them.