Playground equipment wasted on our youth

Playgrounds are everywhere these days, mocking adults with their existence.

At least it seems like it.

Haven't you ever been driving along, past a park or a fast food restaurant, and suddenly thought about how awesome it'd be to go down a slide or crawl through a plastic tunnel right that very moment?

Alas, society today seems to frown upon adults participating in such activities.

Consider the height requirement, enforced by the snide cardboard clown with the hand bidding customers be at least this tall to run amok. And not an inch more.

It's a shame, because just as one finally begins to gain enough cognizance and maturity to actually enjoy the activities they proffer, one finds oneself suddenly too tall.

All those memories of delight and enjoyment vanish beneath the memories of being chased out of the ball pit, turned away from the teeter-totter or falling off the city park swing when the chain breaks.

There's a reason roller coasters and water slides are so popular, you know. They're tapping into our ancient yearning to return to the days on the playground.

I've learned a lot since elementary school; I'm relatively certain I could finally, finally dominate foursquare.

Eventually, we must all face the fact we're too grown up to use the same equipment which once brought us the simplest of pleasures. Or not, if you were like me and tended to become terrified at the top of slides.

Oh, the things I would go back now and tell my elementary school-aged self!

We're the ones forced to sit down at our Happy Meal-less lunch tables — no toys for you, big kids! — and be pelted with the screams of delight emanating from the play area.

We become the swing pushers, and not the swingees. (I was going to say "swingers," but there's a whole different connotation to this word, and this is a family newspaper, so I shan't elaborate.)

Supposedly, age comes with its own rewards, like the ability to vote, pay taxes and skiing, but I often wonder whether we're not missing out on a truly precious reward — the chance to once again, swing from the monkey bars or take a ride down a big, curly slide at a moment's notice.