Discontinued foods a recipe for heartbreak
I hate impossible cravings.
Why must the food companies play with my heart so?
For the last few weeks, I've been longing for strawberry snack pies.
You know the ones — they've got prime status in any grocery store, gas station or bakery.
They consist of a doughnut-type bread, with a fruity or chocolatey-type filling. They're fast and cheap.
And (sob) I need one! Preferably in strawberry flavor, which I'm sure I've had before, but so long ago I don't know whether they're seasonal, have been discontinued or — something which seems more likely as time plods along with out — if they even existed at all.
As I bide my time waiting for strawberry season, I've been trying to stem my frustrations with strawberry substitutes — apple, cherry and lemon, the last one being so good it merits its own level of the deliciousness chain.
I wish I could say it's the first time I've fallen for a food item which is desperate to vanish. But apparently I give up my heart too easily to the first tasty snack treat which comes along. Always I am left behind, crying over an empty plate.
Should I never have sampled these things in the first place? Would I have been better off sticking to the tried and true, the "popular" items which have lasted for years and years.
Some days I wonder. I certainly would be a happier shopper, never rushing down certain items to see if the gods have smiled upon me and elected to revive one of the foods which has haunted my dreams for so long.
Here is a look back at some of the other wondrous food offerings I've loved and lost:
A&W Cream Soda. Actually, I was all set to declare this soft drink (my soft drink of choice for many years) dead and gone the way of the dodo, at least around the area. But I've recently spotted it in at least two regional stores, which goes to show some dodos are not as dead as we think they are. If only other food choices' demises could be so exaggerated.
Creme Supremes. I actually barely got to sample these fruit snacks covered with white yogurt, because they were my younger brother's go-to snack when he was growing up. Every so once in a while I could charm and wheedle a pouch from him, but it usually came at too high a cost. Even at his young age, he could pull off quite the swindle.
There were these ready-made meat pouches several years ago which came with already-cooked meat. All one had to do was break up the meat in a frying pan, and add either refried beans for Mexican or spaghetti sauce for Italian, and you had a versatile, no-mess, simple mixture which could be the building block for almost anything, from spaghetti to nacho dip to lasagna. I don't cook as much without it.
Chun King soy sauce. Discontinued. First my Mexican and my Spanish, and now my Chinese food? They're attacking us from all sides!
About a decade ago, there were these Dorito chips with Cheeto cheese flavoring atop them. Now, pause for a moment to let the magic and wonder of such an object sink in. It looked like a Dorito, but it tasted like a Cheeto. Once you've gone there, it's hard to look at the chips aisle the same way ever again.