Spaceburgers!!!!!!!!!

Hallelujah.

Nothing's more troubling than a sudden urge for Spaceburgers in mid-December, late September or early March.

That's because there are only a few rare instances where it's possible to partake in the delicacy, and the biggest instance is this week, during the Grant County Fair.

Which means, as I'm certain you're aware, it's time to stock up on Spaceburgers. By which I do not mean, purchase 52 and then keep them frozen, consuming one a week each week until the fair rolls around again in 2008.

Thawed Spaceburgers lose something in the taste, methinks. It's the same as having a Pete's Pizza calzone reheated: The flavor, the consistency of the dough and the overall experience lose something in the process.

But I've always been a seasonal flavor kind of guy — pumpkin ice cream in October, eggnog in winter and huckleberries whenever huckleberry season is.

And right now, 'tis the season for Spaceburgers.

I was not a big fair person while I was growing up in Spokane, save for the occasional elementary school field trip, so I confess to some initial trepidation during my first Grant County Fair, three years ago.

But each year, I find something new to enjoy and take away from the annual event, be it an interaction, a particularly vocal rooster, a ride, an event, some new offering or — above all else — the food.

Red licorice ropes, deep-fried Twinkies, gyros and ginormous turkey legs abound.

But it is to the Spaceburger to which, if only for a week, this week, we all must bow.

As a co-worker put it, Spaceburgers are mandatory. Then he proffered the opinion it should be illegal to walk through the fair without a Spaceburger, which is a really funny image, especially when it comes to enforcement:

"Hey, you! Yeah, you, with your arms full of cotton candy, the pretzels and the blue ribbons! Where's your Spaceburger?"

For this brief time, we must order our fill of them. For some, that means one. For others, it means vast quantities.

Whatever one's feelings toward them, there's a reason the delicacy has lasted as long as it has, and proven to be the most popular offering each year at the fair.

If we were to take a Spaceburger, though, and place it under a microscope, I don't think their secret would be visible. And it certainly can't be viewed using the naked eye.

I think the answer is similar to a sentiment a good friend of mine once put forth when discussing another culinary masterwork, the Krispy Kreme doughnut:

"They're magic," he said simply, and he was correct.

If he ever samples a Spaceburger, I think he would find a similar sorcery at work.

Matthew Weaver is the business and agriculture reporter for the Columbia Basin Herald. Sometime, he will have to tell you about his crippling addiction for licorice ropes.