An eye for an eye, a gift for a gift

Does the world really need the Chia Pet?

The unspoken laws of gift giving must be overhauled. That's all I'm asking Santa Claus for this year.

Too many gifts are purchased — not because we want to — but because we feel we have to. This pattern is shushing the spirit of Christmas!

Gift giving is good for the economy though, right? Maybe, but I'm tired of Wal-Mart having more fun on Christmas than the rest of us.

If all somebody wants for Christmas are their two front teeth, by all means, help them. For the little people, as in kids, try and check off a couple items on their wish list.

Also, I wouldn't discourage contributions to valuable programs like Grant County Public Utility District's "Share the Warmth." Being generous to those in need feels good. That's the true spirit of Christmas.

I'm tired of fussy family members and the pressure to buy gifts scaring us to malls and packed department stores to battle crowds in a last-minute shopping scramble.

Here are some definite signs of trouble:

? Have you become a skilled "re-gifter?" Folks, your dirty little secret is out. It's offensive. Everyone knows when they've been re-gifted.

? Is most of your shopping the miserable, last-minute variety? Are you frustrated with the people on your list, just because they're on your list? Wouldn't it be nice to call them in November and say: "I'll take you off my Christmas gift list, if you take me off yours." Would anyone really object?

? You gave grandma and grandpa the DVD for "Any Given Sunday" on Christmas. You see them on Easter, but they fail to recall, much to your disappointment, the subtle wisdom contained in the movie's dialogue. Later, you find out they're still using a VCR and don't own a DVD player.

? Every time you see uncle Bob, he's "coincidentally" wearing the green sweater you bought him for Christmas. Don't make poor Bob wear clothes he hates.

Gift cards to Starbucks, the local car wash or gas station are letting too many of us off the hook. Wouldn't it be easier if we all just kept our money?

If you've got a good idea for someone, go for it. If you don't, save your money.

It's enough, I believe, that we all come together as a family for the holidays. Simply sharing a meal and time together doesn't happen often enough.

David Cole is the county reporter for the Columbia Basin Herald. He prefers victories for the Denver Broncos as Christmas gifts despite the unwillingness of certain Seattle Seahawk fans to provide them.