Where did America go?

I have this friend named Tim. We have been best friends since my freshman year in college. And yet sometimes we can't agree on whether the sun is hot.

Still, nobody would say that I hate Tim.

I know this woman named Nena. She's my mom, and she's great. But sometimes we drive each other crazy.

Still, nobody would call me a mom-hater.

Then why is it that lately I can't disagree with anything regarding America without being labeled an America-hater? Without being told that I either have to love it or leave it? What happened in this nation of multicolored brothers and sisters that made it so intolerant of dissent?

America was founded on dissent. Didn't like being told what to believe in, so we jumped on a boat and crossed the pond. Didn't like taxation without representation, so we took the fight to the British and formed our own country.

So why is that very same country so bent in having a nation of goose-steppers? Everybody has to march in line, and if you don't, you are either a warmonger or an America-hater; a pink liberal commie or a reactionary right-wing nut.

We are all terrified of disagreement. What is worse, both the media and the government demonize anything that vaguely resembles an I-Don't-Think-So. From the Patriot Act to Bill Maher to Toby Keith to Fahrenheit 9/11, nothing that is not entirely dripping of our own hues of red white and blue is accepted.

Trouble is, there is nothing more American than disagreement. From Rosa Parks doing the ultimate this-seat-is-taken, to fervent anti-communist Ronald Reagan saying "I think I'll talk to this Gorbachev fellow," taking the road less traveled is more American than driving a Ford down Route 66 while eating a slice of apple pie.

(For those of you who are Chevy lovers, your car is named after a French race car driver. Ford is way more American. There I go, disagreeing again. But I digress.)

The answers to why we have become so intolerant are many. Some say it is because the country is at war. War, however, is nothing new to this country, what with an average of one conflict every 20 years.

What feels new, especially to the younger generations, is this total and all-consuming dislike of the other side. And by that, I don't mean Al-Qaeda, which in many fronts has become a secondary enemy in the discussions about the war.

The primary enemy for too many of us is the neighbor who has the yard sign demanding the troops be brought back or the brother-in-law who comes to the family dinner wearing a "W" lapel pin. They are not our real foes but they are in disagreement with us, and that makes them the enemy.

Such black-and-white thought is typical of the society we live in today. And as easy to digest as it is, it is inherently flawed.

It is flawed because supporting the troops and supporting the war are not the same thing. You can support the troops and disagree with the goings-on in Iraq at the same time. Ask a relative of a soldier in Iraq. Many of them believe we are doing the right thing, and yet, nobody wants them back more.

However, today's America has no room for disagreement or non-linear thinking. There is room for countless idiotic reality shows that enrich our lives in no apparent way, more professional sport teams than ever, but little vacancy is available for someone to say "Kerry," someone else to say "Bush," and for them to remain friends, or for someone else to say "I like Bush, but…" or "Kerry is kind of…" and get away with it unscathed.

Instead of relishing free public discussion, we crush it like we did the statues of Saddam, himself a tyrannical master of silencing dissent. We went in to help a nation regain its right to express itself, and in the process, we are losing our own.

Instead of enriching our intellectual garden by planting flowers of every color, we are becoming masters at planting tree trunks, with an ax handy in case a branch pokes out.

People's opinions, as disagreeable as they may be compared to mine or yours, should at least be respected. The troops, regardless on your views on the war should not be spared our prayers and our gratitude. That is the nation I knew and cherished. Your voice, my voice, their voice. Your troops, my troops, their troops. Isn't America great?

Sadly, these days, it rarely is. It's angry, intolerant, and divided.